Is it possible to be depressed even though you are almost over your monthly cramps? It is possible to be depressed during it but I dont know about after… I was just thinking about my bills that are upcoming due especially that $500+ bill that I owe Futureshop. :paperbag I calculate how much left over after paying that bill that there isnt a whole lot. Not to mention the other bills that need paying. God I need another job with higher pay. I decided to look at Ryerson’s career center website. They had these links to places where I could find a job and found a section where professors in the University are looking for help like webdesigners, assistants and what not. Obviously I was interested on the openings as webdesigners. There were at least 10 positions that I found but I was only interested in at least 3. Most of the positions required a portfolio. And I thought portfolios are only for art students. :slant I guess not. I dont have a portfolio. I guess I’m going to have to start on that. Maybe build up as I get older and have more experience in computers. 2 out of the 3 positions that I found need not show portfolios but they did want 2 references. I dont have references when it comes to my computer skills but I do have reference from my current job. Anyway I created a second resume which I do hope to send in to those 2 positions. It would be awesome to have that job and make $10/hour. I know I’m not professional but I do have experience.

Gah, MT is being a bitch again. :irked It decides to remove the blogs that are too long. Not everyone blogs every damn day you know! :confused Anyway aside from that, the weather is getting colder in here and I am getting ready for the change in weather. That means that I may get sick soon. Yes, I get sick everytime there’s a change from winter to summer, summer to fall to winter. I’m prepared for it. Bring it on, cold! :devil I got my pills handy! :lol2

Nothing much is going except for school stuff. Test next week on Philosophy but before that its Thanksgiving. I think I might skip it and study. I’m evil I know but I’m working on the weekend so I cant exactly study on those days. I have yet to send my resume and cover letter to the web design folks. I’m a little nervous for they may end up reading this. :rosiecheeks If I dont get the job, then its a disappointment… But I’ll live. :bigmouth

So work today was a-ok despite the fact that it was busier than a regular Sunday. I made 4 times as much as a regular Sunday. It’s not alot.. Trust me on that. It wasnt busy but people just bought expensive stuff because it’s Thanksgiving and all. Not alot of weirdos except for 2 people who had a real bad attitude. :slant Tomorrow I’m going to really study for Philosophy. I had planned/wanted to study today and yesterday but I get really tired after work that i just want to relax as soon as I get home. :rosiecheeks. Since tomorrow is a holiday, it’s studying time. Then check my Winter schedule on Tuesday and after the test, working again… :irked Oh well.. Maybe I can do my math if it’s not busy… :read I’m such a geek.

Nothing much to say really. Boring entry. :confused

So physics is being a pain in the arse right now. Not because I couldnt do a question but because I just received an email back from one of the professors saying how I have problems in math than Maple. Maple is a program that we use to do physics quizzes and what not. Ok maybe I have problems in physics not problems in math because I’m 100% sure that I can do so much better in Calculus than Physics. Physics is one of the worst subjects taht I have ever taken.:slant It’s such a pain in the arse. :butthead So yeah thank God I wont be mark on that one but the one that I just sent in tonight will be…. I dont think I will do very well except for the second question… :confused

Gosh ’til again Friday… I got free 4 pieces of Sushi today! :jump After physics a guy was giving them out to students and I happened to be walking around. So after math, I went to the sushi place and grabbed it. 8 pieces is pretty cheap compared to ones I’ve had before. I have eaten cheaper ones but oh well. I might stop by there sometime during the school if I have the $ to buy some. :sly

Hmmm so have you ever met someone and got to know them then they just disappear from you? The exact same thing happened to me this year. A few months ago probably around June. I had talked to a friend who I hadnt talked to a for a few weeks maybe. We were suppose to meet at the end of June but he just disappeared from my life. From July and now, I havent heard from them. I have no contact with this person except by email. That’s basically the main reason why I want to learn how to hack in someones hotmail account. :rude Evil I know….. This isnt the first time he has disappeared like this but it was never this long… My mind just keeps spinning for I keep coming up of possible reasons why he had gone so long. Did he decide to stay away from me? Did he get into some accident? He has gone into accidents… Car accidents mostly…. or worst comes to worst, did he die? It’s killing me that I dont know whats going with him. He’s not online anymore and I am still in his msn list. :sad There was even a time when I was looking for obituaries on the net for Ontario but no luck in that….:paperbag This is always going to haunt me unless somebody or something gives me a clue… I think it’s better off that someone tell me that he died so that I could live with my life…..:banghead

(added)
Read your email, Jean. The one with the efflux.org domain. :D

So today I thought I would go to my Professors office hour and ask for help in my math assignment. I didnt because I got tired. I didnt get enough sleep last night and I was practically sleeping in the bus and subway today. The subway ride was alot faster now that I had slept through it. :rosiecheeks Back in highschool, I didnt think I would ever sleep in the bus or the subway but now that I’m in university, I can practically sleep anywhere! Even in class (especially in Philosophy)! :sleep I tried to be as awake as possible. I was a little bit awake. I knew what was going on but some parts just wasnt getting to me at all… Shame.. Then today we also got our tests back. I did ok I guess. I had wanted to get more but I’ll be ok with my mark. It wasnt even a B…. :look But definitely better if I had stayed in UofT. :slant Thats a fact..

So tonight a new show is up. It’s like America’s Next Top Model but for men! :winktongue Yummy.. There will be alot of hot guys!!! It’s on at Bravo at 8 pm and 10 pm Eastern. He (look below) is one of the contestants… Who wouldve guessed that he wasnt straight!!! :eek Shame….

I think I failed my physics test…:weeping The test wasnt that difficult but if only I looked over at some questions in my notes that were similar to the ones in the test then maybe I wouldve gotten a better mark. Hmmmm…. Thats about it for that… I dont want to talk about it. I got another test to go next week Friday. It’s going to be even harder though..:nervous

Tomorrow is my Dad’s birthday. He’s turning 50. Wow thats old. :rosiecheeks. I’m a little excited for there’s going to be Pumpkin Pie… Yummm… My favourite desert besides cheesecake. :winktongue I’m probably going to have some since it’s just there sitting in the fridge…..

A few days ago, I got a phone from Rogers Communications. When I answered, a machine (sorta like an answering machine) told me to hold on for the person will be with me. Hmmm..:sowhat Now I’m thinking.. This person is calling me and I HAVE to wait?! What is that about?! I think it should be the way around. I think he should wait for me to respond. That’s why you call someone because you need them for something therefore you should wait. That’s why they invented ‘Call Waiting’ so the caller waits until you’re ready not me waiting for the caller. Thats bloody ridiculous. :irked So I waited for a few seconds and each time I talked, the machine told me to wait…. That really irked me. :snooty Then it turns out the call was for another telemarketing recruiting my mom to buy internet. :slant Worthless.

It’s funny how life seems to put you in this twists and turns that you never would have expected…. Like today the physics lab wasnt so bad… At first it started in shaky because one of our partners decided to go with another group..:look I’m guess because she doesnt like my other partner. (There’s only 3 people in the group). So considering how the lab was about circuits we chicks didnt really know how to do this…. So we decided to go to another lab that consisted of 2 guys. They said yes for they also didnt know what was going on. But 4 brains are better than 2, right? The lab went by smoothly and I even got to talk to the cute guy in class. I did want to be in his group but you know.. I got shy on joining..:rosiecheeks So thats lab for the day.

Then tonight as I was checking out someones profile on MSN, I was shocked at the fact that this person changed it. This is the same person that I thought was missing or have died literally because he stopped talking to me and just disappeared without any warnings or reasons. I tried to keep in contact with him by emailing (I only know him through the net) but he never replied. So I had thought that he died or something for we havent talked since July of 2004. So knowing that he had changed his profile just proves that he is alive. The worst part is he doesnt want anything to do with me. I’m still in his msn list but I cant see his online presence thus proves that he has also blocked me off his list. Great… Just ignore me why dont you. If you didnt want anything to do with me, the least a person can do is let me know and at least have a little argument with me so I can hate you. :snooty I guess his way is the cowardly way out. So I blocked him back… Just because I, too, dont want anything to do with him…. :angryfire

Alright so tonight is all Hallow’s Eve. I was working today and the store decided to give out some lollipops. They said to start giving them out at 3:30 pm. By 2 pm kids were already coming in the store and asking if we’re giving out candies. I kept telling them to wait until 3:30pm. It’s mall policy. 3:30 until 4:30 is Halloween time in the mall. So yeah. There were alot of them. Some even formed a line whenever I served customers. I was again working by myself. We were busy not because of customers but rather of trick-or-treaters. Some kids didnt even wear costume and didnt say ‘Trick or Treat’. All they wanted was candy. Others went in twice and maybe more to grab more lollipops. Kids these days. I think they should wear their costume & not leave it at home. Halloween is one of the days when kids gain weight and be fatter than they already are. :irked lol I’m so bitter. :bigmouth So thats my day at work. Then once I got home more kids were ringing the doorbell. We didnt have any candy for the first time for Halloween but oh well. My mom even blamed me because I didnt by any candies. Well excuse me? I’m the one that had to work by myself in the mall. Do you think I would have time to buy candies? :sowhat The doorbell kept on ringing which eventually got my brother all bothered so he decided to put up a sign on the door that says ‘Sorry no candy!’. Lol how creative. :slant

Speaking of school, I’ve decided not to go to class tomorrow. It’s waste of time plus I need a weekend since I spent mine working. Plus I also need to say in here that I passed my Physics test by 50%!!!!:jump I’m very happy about that considering how the class average was 48%!!!!:yikes I was definitely shocked with that. I guess I just got lucky with that 50%. People in my class were so angry that they were complaining that the questions in the tests were so much harder than the questions assigned in the book. They are right but you know… What can we do about it? It is a first year university course. And they also make your life a living hell when youre in first year…. Then last friday I had my math test. It was way easier than physics and I felt confident doing the test…. I think I did pretty well but I dont want to jinx it. :winktongue